Sunday, March 10, 2013

About Last Week, And About Yesterday

I told my midwife that I had my big "mama" trip (no pregnant jokes please) planned.  She said these words to me "remember Carly, part of you is still the woman you were before you had them, it is important that you don't forget her."

Truthfully, sometimes I would like to forget her.  She made poor choices and was extremely selfish.  There are other parts of that girl/woman, that I have forgotten that I wish I hadn't.  The girl that could have a conversation that didn't end up with some kind of poopy diaper talk, or the girl that could stroll with her bff around our favorite store never buying one thing but touching everything for hours.

 There was a dreamer and a lover in that girl, and though the every dayness of  life may have sent her into dormancy, I want her to come back.  I want my girls to know her and I don't want my Love to forget her.  She was real, as real as I am right now. I know that the  person I have become is important, faithful wife/loving Mama, but that girl, spontaneous and free spirited....that girl is important too.  Taking my little trip help me realize that.
When I stepped off the plane and the warm Florida breeze hit my face, I was nervous b/c I was sure that I wouldn't want to leave and surely someone's heart would be broken.  As it turns out, on my last day there, when I called Kev from the terminal to let him know I arrived safely, I heard a precious voice in the background say "Hi Mommy," and just like that my heart was ready to come home to them.  In fact, I burst into tears in the middle of terminal D and I couldn't wait to kiss their faces, and hold them, and love all three and be home...Because my home is  right where they are. 

Yesterday, seeing that I needed a bit of that spontaneity in my life, I packed the girls up for a little drive.  Our adventure "just for girls" as Libby put it, resulted in a long day in the car with about an hour break at the beach for fun.  It is not exactly what I planned but I love to watch them run at the beach.   I would have let them play longer but the baby was telling to find a bathroom asap.

 I have a pocket-full of broken sea shells now...diligent little hunters.

 We stopped for a Starbucks break before heading back to the car to sit in traffic for 30 extra minutes.
 Thirty minutes that Maggie cried because she took her shoe off and wanted it back on.  Thirty minutes of Libby yelling at Maggie to calm her down (I tried to explain that this doesn't work that well.)  Thirty minutes of me sneezing uncontrollably because of the worst allergy attack of my life...
 We made it home in one piece, hours later than we should have.  I'm still not sure why I decided that was how we should spend a sunny Saturday.  I am hoping the girls will remember it as the day Mommy drove for three hours so we could play for 20 minutes in the cold sand.
 All smiles for church this morning...For the record, I knew buying white leggings for a 4 year old was a big mistake.  Before the day was over the left leg of those leggings was covered in mud from top to bottom.  Another lesson learned, no white leggings, and park you car close to public restrooms when you're pregnant.
Wow...the knowledge I've gained this weekend.
One more thing, before I wrap this up.  Day light savings completely messed me up tonight.  I put the girls down an hour late for naps, took them to the park at 6:00, fed them dinner at 8:00 and only just got them down for bedtime at 9:30!
I'll get my act together in the morning.
Grace and Peace


Anonymous said...

Sister...I love you! Thank you for making me smile this morning. Love the baby belly pics <3 Miss you (even if you did go to FL instead of coming to offense Laura and Erin ;) )...

Art Teacher's Mom said...

Thanks for posting some new pictures of the girls.
Wonder what was going on in the bedroom with the curtains. :)

Looking back I think you'll be happy you made the little trek to the beach...even though brief, you were able to get some sweet photos.