A Full Range Of Happy Emotions

I have a confession...please don't judge me.
I mean, you can if you want to, but I'm just trying to be honest.
Here goes, with out being too explicit... my body has always been on it's own very random schedule, so depending on 28 days to tell me if I should expect anything exciting in the coming months has never really worked for me...Therefore, in the 5 years that I have been married, I have probably spent a good portion of Libby's college fund on pregnacy tests.  When we were wanting to be pregnant with Libby, months went by that I hovered of a plastic stick in hopes that  the lines would cross, or that there would be two lines instead of one, or digitally I would read the words "pregnant" instead of "not pregnant."  ("Not pregnant" always felt like such a slap in the face,  like when I was single and I would check my messages and the voice mail would say "no messages," so harsh, a bitter sting that what I wanted did not happen)  I digress...
Fast forward to some weeks ago...
Picture it, a sunny April morning,  Libby and I wake up to the cat stuck out on the roof, meowing loudly.  We rescue the cat and I say to myself, "self, I will not waste time on the internet today, but I think I will take a pregnancy test."  So there we waited, me and the Little hovered over a plastic stick, waiting for those magic words to appear...pregnant!

I can't really describe the feelings I had at this moment (I know I felt the same way with Libby though..tears, fears, convulsions, nausea, etc.).   I'm pretty sure it felt like flying, like an out of body experience, like it wasn't happening to me...surreal.  I throw on a layer of lip gloss and a pony tail, grabbed the Little, still in her pj's, whistle for the dog, and drive like a crazy woman over to Kev's office.  When I showed him what had unfolded in our morning activities, he stood in disbelief, certain that there was no way a test would register positive in such a short amount of time.  We basically found out when  I was about a minute pregnant... the cells were still dividing, I had no signs of pregnancy, I was about 4 days away from actually needing to even take a test...I just thought it would be a good way to start the day.  Turns out, it really is the best way to begin your morning, even better than a good cup of coffee...which  indecently I can't even stand the thought of now.

And so it is, that God is blessing our little corner of this world again...a tiny hearts beats even now as I type, their little body is hard at work growing, and I have the sickness,  the exhaustion, and the I'm on my second pregnancy bump,  to show for it.

We are happy..and while two babies is something that I really can't wrap my head around, I know that God will give me the grace to love the Little and the Littlest just the same.

Here's hoping that this post made you grin from ear to ear, as promised...it did for me.

The secret's out...my maternity jeans won't let me hide it any longer!

Grace and Peace