Sunday, November 16, 2008

Ouch

We put Libby down for a nap last night in her crib, in her room. Her nap lasted past our bed time so we decided to leave her for the night, for the first time.
When I crawled into bed and realized that the space in her pack and play next to me was quiet and empty something inside began to ache. Kev asked me what was wrong and I told him that I didn't know that it would be this hard, letting her become. I know it is silly, sleeping in her room is a baby step of life, but to me it felt monumental. Of course it is what I want to happen, I want her to grow up strong and healthy and independent, but with each passing day as she changes, the tug on my heart pulls harder and I want to hold tighter. Life however, will continue asking me to let her go. I might be being a little bit extreme(it's what I do), but as I lay in my bed last night crying myself to sleep, I missed her and I realized that being a mom is more difficult than I ever imagined it would be.


PS. All my post are becoming very similar. I'm sorry. I did do art again, I'll post at another time. Posting pictures of baby details is more fun for me right now.
By the way, out little Freedom Flower turned 2 months old this weekend and has the rolls and crevasses to prove it.

3 comments:

Erin said...

can't wait to see you so soon! i know, it's hard to put them in the crib...but I bet she will sleep really good :-) let's pray,right!!!! see you THRS!

MommyB said...

Aww congrats on your beautiful 2 month old! I know it's tough letting go and she's going to be an awesome independent lady some day. Enjoy her being little and I know you'll keep those special moments in your heart.

Jennifer said...

when are you coming!